Give me a break, I give up!

    Just when I think things have taken a turn for the better, life throws one back at me...again.

    My RE was concerned about PCOS elevating my sugar and impairing my insulin so, on our first visit a few months ago, I had an A1c test which showed slightly elevated.  Then he wanted me to get a glucose tolerance test.  After playing phone tag for a week with my primary care doctor's office finally got me in.

    It was a terrible experience.  Right off the bat my phlebotomist came out and said that this was his first time ever doing this.  I could tell because the glucose he gave me, I think, was too much.  I read the instructions and the whole bottle was 100 grams... For pregnant women testing for gestational diabetes they get 100 grams and non pregnant women are suppose to get 80.  Needless to say, the guy had no idea and had me drink the whole bottle.  After he proceeded to blow both of my garden hose veins in my AC, he said I would get a blood draw every hour. I'm not sure if it makes a difference but he was late 15 minutes past every hour.

   Longer story short, I got a voicemail from my RE yesterday stating that my levels were abnormal and they could indicate diabetes.  He then said he was stopping my treatment until I could get this under control.  WHAT? He is an endocrinologist after all!!  He had written me an RX for metformin on our last appointment, I don't understand why he just won't start me on that... I mean, when my family doctor called me with the results he said that's all I would need.

    So now after all of the progress we have made with the RE is gone.  You know how they say you are most fertile within 3 months after your HSG, that's gone now too.  I am so angry.

    I had so much hope with my RE, he was so confident in us and now that he is stopped my treatment I feel like I have no hope any more.

   Just another thing, I guess, to tack on to our roadblocks.

There is one thing I do not understand.  They said my fasting blood sugar was 177; however, I have been checking my fasting blood sugar every day for the past week and the highest that I have ever gotten was 130, the lowest was 88.  I am so confused!

All of the goals I set for us this year are now out of reach. What am suppose to do now? I am still losing weight, I am still on my new eating habits- what am I doing wrong? I feel like I am being punished.

God, I don't know what message you are trying to get to me.  Can't anything go well?  Can't we ever get some good news? Am I supposed to just not care about this? Please, tell me what I am suppose to do...